* * * Hanging Out With a Bunch of Grad Students * * * Of course, the first thing we'd do is go to the bar The bartender slides a drink in your direction. It looks to consist of 7 parts Head-Poured Strawberry Juice, 8 parts Eggplant Juice Then we'd start talking about what we were doing. They would say things like: Interesting Finished Projects Increased Hair Loss via Acceptable Initialization Values of a Oscillator Prime Numbers Distorted Solution at least until old Farts-on-Bancroft-Tower would walk in. And then we would all say Thou churlish bat-fowling baggage and by that time, either one of us would pass out shortly after mumbling I CAN'T FUCKING FIGURE OUT WHERE I AM or we'd end up telling bad jokes like: What do you call a hub on a porch in the summer?