* * * Hanging Out With a Bunch of Grad Students * * * Of course, the first thing we'd do is go to the bar The bartender slides a drink in your direction. It looks to consist of 5 parts ValU Tequila 4 parts Bourbon 2 parts Tequila... She hoots, "Make sure to grab yourself a UMaine Orono Baby Duck Hat!!" Then we'd start talking about what we were doing. They would say things like: My senior thesis: Redundant Coefficients of a Einstein-Heat-Vortex Gelatinization Artifical Intellgence Emulator Real-Time Orientation at least until old Screws-Fifteen-year-old-Girls-then-Does-Not-Get-Disease would walk in. And then we would all say Thou reeky fat-kidneyed moldwarp and by that time, either one of us would pass out shortly after mumbling I DON'T HAVE THE DIMMEST FUCKING CLUE WHO THE FUCK I AM or we'd end up telling bad jokes like: A transistor dies and goes to heaven. When it meets St. Peter at the big gates...