* * * Hanging Out With a Bunch of Grad Students * * * Of course, the first thing we'd do is go to the bar The bartender sizes you up and begins mixing a drink: 3 parts Bourbon, 6 parts Pot... She says, "Take a Coaster!!" Then we'd start talking about what we were doing. They would say things like: My company is working on a project called: Generation of Proprietary Harmonics of a R. Westheimer-Sphere Chess-playing Optimal Sequence in a Wholly Gauche Environment at least until old Fucks-Thirty-Five-year-old-Women-then-Does-Not-Get-Disease would walk in. And then we would all say Thou jarring milk-livered lout and by that time, either one of us would pass out shortly after mumbling I DON'T HAVE ANY CLUE WHERE THE FUCK I AM or we'd end up telling bad jokes like: What do you call a network switch underwater?